Friday, March 16, 2018

What We Have Here is a Failure to Communicate!

This meme made me laugh!! 😂

[Photo credit:]
Okay so we all know that this picture is exaggerating... but it's true that husbands and wives need to realize that their brains may process things differently! In my personal experience, I've found that my husband will focus on one idea at a time and I'll be bouncing all over, making connections, seeing a big grand picture in my mind. And it's so exciting! (so I go on...) "And this! And that! And the other!!"

But then I suddenly realize that he hasn't said anything for awhile and stop to ask him what he thinks. Turns out that he had formulated a response for the first thing I brought up and was waiting to say that, but it was now irrelevant because I have gone through ten more subjects since then. 🤣 So at this point he has ten different possible responses, and he's trying to decide which one to comment on. (silence... thinking... silence...)

In my excited enthusiasm (and lack of patience) I see his hesitancy as not having a response at all, so I start up again to fill the void... and leave him in the dust again! And the cycle repeats. Or at some point I may stop and be like, "How come you're not interested? This is exciting!!" But the poor man is just trying to keep up with the topic changes!!

As Jed Clampett once said on the Beverly Hillbillies, "What we have here is a failure to communicate!!" (This is one of my husband's favorite quotes. For context, just watch this funny video clip from 1:00 to 2:30. )

When communicating with my husband, no matter how enthusiastic I am, if I want him to participate in the conversation, I have had to learn to slow down and WAIT (and even count to ten in my head!) and patiently give him time to comment, one subject at a time. (It's so hard!!!) But it's amazing how much better we communicate when I do this! And he has had to learn to comment OUT LOUD, not just in his head haha. 🤔

It's a process! But it's worth it to take the time to learn how your spouse communicates and help him understand how you communicate, and then work hard on improving your interactions. Mostly it just takes understanding, love and patience. 💖

What can you do to better understand your spouse today?
Make it a priority for #FamilyFriday!
~JS~ 🌞

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